So this is my stab at this month’s RPG Blog Carnival: Memorable Characters Inspired From Real Life. The real life person, upon which my memorable character was inspired, is no other than the incomprehensible Charlie Sheen, Warlock extraordinaire.
Charles Themasheen was born into a family of entertainers and when he came of age, like his father and brother before him, he heard the irresistible sirens call of the stage. He exploded onto the theatrical scene like a tsunami and his rise was meteoric, as he nabbed coveted lead roles in extravagant and critically acclaimed plays such as Platoon and Wall Street. This was his first taste of winning, and he liked it. He adored the fame, the money, the women, the parties, the women, and even the sycophants. But as many things in life the good times didn’t last. The cruel winds of fate shifted and Charles began to see the coveted roles going to newer and younger actors while he was relegated to performing on the side stages in eyesore productions such as Hotshots and Terminal Velocity. Charles began to despair as he felt the winning begin to slip threw his cigarette burned fingers.
In a fit of despair and drug addled rage after the town crier read the lukewarm and somewhat mocking reviews of his latest work The Shadow Conspiracy, Charles stumbled into the deep dark woods that lined the eastern border of the Kingdom. As he sat, head in hands, he heard a soft, seductive voice call out to him promising the fame, fortune, and winning that he so rightly deserved. As Charles looked up he saw the powerful form of a great black panther silently enter the clearing and bound towards him like liquid night. As the great cat came to a stop in front of him and he locked eyes with it, he heard the voice again, “taste of my blood and all of what you desire shall be yours again”. Needless to say you didn’t have to ask Charles twice as he bogarted that panther blood like it was bongwater.
After he returned to the kingdom his agent contacted him with the offer for a new gig. It seemed that the king himself was in need of a new court jester. When he heard this news the panther blood within him began to sing and Charles new that playing the fool was his path to winning again. And win he did, it all came back the fame, the women, the adoration, the women, and wagon full’s of money. He was paired with two other jesters, a troll disguised as a human and a Halfling, and collectively they were known as two and a half men. The run he was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jagger, Richards all look like droopy-eyed, armless children. He noticed strange new powers and abilities like incredible fortitude and constitution. He found he could take more drugs and bang more women than any mere mortal could survive. He was banging seven-gram rocks because that’s how he rolled. He learned that he now only had one speed, which was “Go”. But like so many before him, Charles learned that there is always a steep price to pay when one makes a dark pact. With the panther blood fuelling his natural narcissism Charles barely noticed the insanity that was slowly gripping him. He began not playing by the king’s rules and his jesting and court foolery began to cross the line into open insults. That soft, seductive voice kept whispering to him, convincing him that he didn’t need the king and that he had to stop pretending he wasn’t special and that he was a total bitchin’ rock star from mars. The final straw came when one of the kings men suggested he tone things down a bit, you know for the good of the realm. Charles flew into a terrible narcissistic rage and laid a horrible curse on the king, transforming him into a lowly earth worm before vanishing from the court.
You the brave adventures have been hired by the Queen to exact punishment on Themasheen and force him to lift his curse. It is thought that Themasheen has retreated to his ocean front lair with his “goddesses”, so confident and deluded in his belief that no one would dare challenge him. If you are to be victorious, you must not only best Themasheen but also his army of assassins and his “goddesses”, which are believed to be 2 succubae. Your rewards, should you succeed, will be great indeed, for not only will you have the thanks and gratitude of the realm but you will claim Themasheen’s riches as he often stated he was worth well over a 100 billion gold pieces.